It is shocking how many singles use the statement "All the good ones are taken" and how many of them really believe it to be true. No wonder, if your friends confirm it to you and you go out there only to see it for yourself it becomes hard not to believe it. Yet, people keep meeting someone special and getting into loving committed relationships every day. You may wonder what their secret is, I tell you what. They probably have a different belief, the one that says: "There is a good one out there for me who is still available."
All the good ones are taken must be the most common limiting belief for singles, it almost becomes a mantra for some. Why do we choose to believe this? Is this a way to make us feel safe, keep us home alone and not wanting to interact with any potential "good" men or women. Well, why bother, if he is so attractive and interesting to talk to, he must be married or in a committed relationship. Or, conversely, if he is single, there must be something wrong with him that I don't know.
While this type of mentality works well to keep you safe and protected from potential, if not imaginary rejection, it actually keeps you away from meeting your ideal partner. This belief encourages you to settle for a less than ideal relationship. Not only will it keep you from attracting people who are single and available, it will keep you attracted to unavailable. It will actually create a false belief in your head that it is easier to turn around an unavailable person, change his mind and make him available to you if you only do the right thing, then meet someone who is available and appropriate for you in the first place. It is amazing how an imaginary statement you hear over and over again can ring more true to you than the actual truth.
When you say this statement out loud, all the good ones are taken, listen to the sound and the energy of your voice. Do you sound down, irritated, annoyed? When you hear your friends say it to you, what do you hear in their voice? How does it make you feel? When most people hear this statement and chose to believe it, it can only make them do two things. One - comply with it and two - rebel against it. We already know what happens when you comply with it. When you chose to rebel against something you deeply believe to be true, even if you are consciously unwilling to accept it, you're still stuck and blocked from manifesting the relationship you desire. Every person you meet who happens to be attractive to you and in a relationship will become the evidence to support the very thing you're desperately trying not to believe. And that may actually force you to avoid interacting with people you find attractive.
So what is the solution? There are three things you can do to clear your way to attracting your ideal relationship from blocks and limiting beliefs. One, accept that you will continue attracting what you don't want and heal your frustration around it. Two, learn how to say no to what you don't want with clarity and courtesy. Three, continue to believe that what you want is out there for you, because that is the real truth.
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